Every person has self-worth and self-esteem; it might just be hidden a bit….or a lot. I have discovered the top 5 tips to take your self-worth and self-esteem out of their hiding place and show it with pride.
Tip 1: Determine your highest values
Unpack your self-worth and self-esteem in your highest priorities and values. What makes people function is values, meaning what is valued as top priorities and importance. You have your own unique set of values and priorities you live your life by. Everybody has his or her own set of values. In your highest values, you are spontaneously inspired from within to do it. Your highest value is intrinsic, it’s in you. Anytime you do what is highest on your values and are congruent with your values, you raise your self-worth. When you walk your talk, your belief goes up, and your self-esteem goes up. Self-worth is higher, the more congruent you are with your values. You are a natural-born leader that is awakened when you are congruent with your values. The bottom line, your self-worth goes up with congruency to your own highest values.
Dr. John Demartini has identified the 13 most essential questions to ask yourself to determine the highest on your hierarchy of values.
To determine your hierarchy of values that will help you own your self-worth and self-esteem, click on the link:
Tip 2: Set goals congruent with your highest priorities and values
Self-esteem and self-confidence increase with an increase in self-worth, and your self-worth increases as you have clarity about your hierarchy of values and set realistic goals in YOUR hierarchy and not in someone else’s hierarchy of values. When you set goals congruent to your highest values, you have the highest probability of succeeding. When you experience the A,B,C,D’s of negativity, meaning feeling angry, bitter, challenged, and depressed, you are receiving feedback that you are setting goals in-congruent with your values. Every time you envy someone and imitate them, you create a fantasy and live a pseudo-self-worth, and your self-esteem lowers, and you create suffering and become ungrateful. Set your goals in YOUR hierarchy of values and not in someone else’s’.
Tip 3: Compare yourself with yourself
You grow self-worth by being authentic to your hierarchy of values. This makes you a magnet, and people feel safe around you and want to learn from you. When you are genuine and real to your values, you become magnetic and influential, and you attract opportunities. Compare yourself with your own goals, action steps, and dreams you have set for yourself. Comparing you with someone else who, in any case, has a different hierarchy of values is suicide. Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “Envy is ignorance, Imitation is Suicide.” in his book “Self-Reliance. How exact these words are and how futile to compare yourself to someone who has different values and priorities than you.
Tip 4: Focus on the ONE THING
Ask yourself every day what are the highest priority steps you can take to live your highest values. Ask just for that day. Determine the most common priority steps you are likely to take and determine your top priority steps. You have most self-worth when you focus on high-value priorities because the rest of your life gets more ordered and organized, and you attract more opportunities in your hierarchy of values. The majority of what you want will come from the minority of what you do. To achieve the desired results, you must choose what matters most and give it all the time it demands. Ask yourself what the ONE THING you can do that is would mean the most to you and the impact and influence you want to have in your world.
Tip 5: Doing something extraordinary on this planet.
You wake up your authenticity when you live your highest values or telos because your telos is the most meaningful, fulfilling, most loving thing for you to do. Your self-worth, self-esteem, and self-confidence are the highest when you are driven by your purpose, whether it is to be a great mother/father for your kids, or a successful entrepreneur, or a supportive wife, or a great friend or the discoverer of a new health product. The truth about success and subsequent self-worth is directly linked to your ability to achieve extraordinary results in the future in stringing together powerful moments, one after the other. Putting together a life of exceptional results simply comes down to getting the most out of what you do, when what you do matters to you. What is your extraordinary?
I recommend the following books for you to read if you want to learn more about the topic:
- “How to win friends and influence people” Dale Carnegie.
- “The one thing” Gary Keller.
- “The value factors” Dr. John Demartini.